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图呦，亲！给我讲个笑话吧，能逗笑我的，我笑点滴_百度知道
给我讲个笑话吧，能逗笑我的，我笑点滴
提问者采纳
当着多少号男男女女的就哭了啊，路上看见一对情侣带着花的就是一句。然后情人节那天心情就不好了，不然打你男朋友。，我们五六个成功的都捧了一大捧花，这货哭完了之后做了一件让我们至今记忆犹新的事。喝完了逛到街上的时候这丫竟然就哭了。现在还是恩恩爱爱的的有个很强悍的朋友，然后扔到他女朋友家的理发店。。，把花给我。，就叫了我们一群苦逼的大光棍们出去喝酒。由于人多势众。。。然后。。。他带我们绕了一大圈。。。。。，情人节前一天女友跟他闹分手
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这是真的吗？这人
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”　　老板！妈：为什么啊，雪碧吧，还是在动的！我妈在我爸手机里什么都没翻着，今天我看到劳斯莱斯了，就不跟我说话了？：知足吧你。　　隔壁桌一哥们大喊道；哦：“好嘞？我，被我爸删了，他说看着闹心。妈？”　　那哥们想了想，就把手机砸了：开车的那个人还戴了双白手套！”　　A：真的！要哪种：……　　那天在街边吃夜宵，拿两瓶可乐来。妈：“嗯：因为所有短信都是我妈发的。 我：我说的是白手套：我男朋友看我有几条暧昧短信？　　B。我。　　A：“老板。　　B；要不要我给你买啊：妈老妈买劳斯莱斯我
1.每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃. 2.&现在的梦想决定着你的将来&,所以还是再睡一会吧. 3.学的越多,知道的越多, 知道的越多,忘记的越多, 忘记的越多,知道的越少,为什么学来着？4.老师:&你会不会?!& &会会,我会,请别罚我站& 老师:&那好,请告诉我澳大利亚的位置.& &这个......我知道,我个人认为是在火星上,我如果说错了,请老师指教......& 能逗笑你吗？ 四句啦！！！
很久很久以前，有一只鬼这鬼很怪他放了个屁就死掉了
我笑了一个下午
老大爷第一次用自动取款机，取款机上传来电脑声音：请输入密码！老大爷左顾右盼看没人，便弯腰侧身，双手拢嘴，低声窃语地告诉取款机：“六个零！”
出租车灵异事件
　　有个刚怀孕的同事，和另一个女同事下班打的回家。
　　突然一个大拐弯，两个人挤到一起。
　　同事说：“哎呀，我们3个人都挤到一起去了。”
　　司机很惊恐地说：“你们不是上来2个人吗？”
我不跟狗谈恋爱
　　一人暗恋一女孩不敢表白，就在一纸条上面写“我喜欢你，能和我交往吗”，让他家狗叼给那女孩。
　　不一会，狗叼着纸条回来了，上面写着：“我不跟狗谈恋爱。”
正在排练吵架
　　小两口子吵架吵得很凶，邻居进来劝架。
　　夫妻俩平时都很爱面子，便掩饰道：“因为我老婆是演员，有吵架的戏，所以我们正在排练。”
　　邻居疑惑地说：“不太像吧？”
　　丈夫马上对妻子：“我说你演戏不投入吧？连邻居都看出来了！再重来一遍！”...
有两辆车撞在一起，一个司机下车说，你眼瞎啦。另一个司机不甘被辱，说，谁说我眼瞎的，我不是把你撞个正着吗......
爸爸说：考个100分，我会高兴屎的。小明说：我不会让你死的，50分！！！！
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出门在外也不愁帮忙写一些英语笑话吧!在笑话后写上中文_百度作业帮
帮忙写一些英语笑话吧!在笑话后写上中文
lgbfetrj957
True StoryTrue story,I was happy.My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year,and so we decided to get married.My parents helped us in every way,my friends encouraged me,and my girlfriend?She was a dream!There was only one thing bothering me,very much indeed,and that one thing was her younger sister.My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age,wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses.She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear.It had to be deliberate.She never did it when she was near anyone else.One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations.She was alone when I arrived.She whispered to me that soon I was to be married,and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.She said,"I'm going upstairs to my bedroom,and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned.I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.I stood there for a moment,then turned and went straight to the front door.I opened the door and stepped out of the house.I walked straight towards my car.My future father-in-law was standing outside.With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said,"We are very happy that you have passed our little test.We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter.Welcome to the family."The moral of this story is:""Always keep your condoms in your car."Screw or SwimMike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a great big smile on his face.Mike says,"Pat,what are you so happy for?""Well Mike,I gotta tell ya...Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat,just waxin' my boat,and a redhead came up to me..tits out to here,Mike.Tits out to here!She says,'Can I have a ride in your boat?' I said 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out,Mike.I turned off the key and I said 'It's either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim,Mike.She couldn't swim!"The next day Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat sitting at the end of the bar with a even bigger smile on his face.Mike says,"What are you happy about today Pat?""Well Mike.I gotta tell ya...Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat,just waxin' my boat and a BEAUTIFUL blond came up to me...tits out to here,Mike.Tits out to here!She said 'Can I have a ride in your boat?' I told her 'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out,Mike.Way out much further than the last one.I turned off the key and I said,'It's either screw or swim!' She couldn't swim,Mike!She couldn't swim!"A couple days pass and Mike walks into a bar and sees Pat down there cryin' over a beer.Mike says,"Pat,what are you so sad for?""Well Mike,I gotta tell ya.Yesterday I was out waxin' my boat,just waxin' my boat,and the most desirable brunette came up to me...tits WAY out to here,Mike.Tits WAY out to here.She says,'Can I have a ride in your boat?' So I said,'Sure you can have a ride in my boat.' So I took her way out,Mike,way WAY out...much further than the last two.I turned off the key,and looked at her tits and said 'It's either screw or swim!'She pulled down her pants and.She had a pecker,Mike!She had this great BIG pecker!...and I can't swim Mike!I can't swim!"Three guys betThree guys were in a bar and they were all pretty smashed.The first guy said,"I bet that if I had one more beer,I could fly!" The other guys bought their friend another drink.After the first guy finished,he walked up to a nearby cliff and jumped off.The other two guys stared in disbelief as the first guy fell,fell,and then suddenly swooped up and landed on the cliff.The second guy said,"I bet I can do that too!" He ran down to the bar,chugged a beer,and ran back up to the cliff.Then the second guy jumped off the cliff,fell,fell,and crashed into the ground below.The third guy turned to the first guy and said,"You're a real jerk when you're drunk,Superman!"
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